Pakwife

[Abuz Zubair]

No offence to anyone. It's just a parody! Just a joke!

It is the preference of an average East London bruv to 'ave an home-based Indian take away known as (pakwife!)
A trouble and strife from back home who don't speak a word of English commonly known as (pakwife!)
David Blunkett, and now John Reed have a chip on their shoulder about us importing what is known as (pakwife!)
Who's that West London bruv eating Fish and Chips? Get a life, mate! 'ave some curry and rice! (pakwife!)

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

Know what I mean, bruv?

This West London bruv's got a British wife. She makes him wash the dishes, cuz she wears the trousers! (pakwife!)
She warned him not to take a second wife. She even writ in her contract... he's under the thumb, mate! (pakwife!)
Me mum got me sorted last summer in Pak on the 10th of June of the Georgian calender... What you lafin' at?! (pakwife!)
And then I went of for a nice honeymoon... just me, my brand new wife... and of course, me grandmother (pakwife!)

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

pakwife!- pakwife!
pakwife!- pakwife!
They're never fussed about shoppin'. They like to sit at home, you know.
pakwife!- pakwife!
And they're not like you British sisters who like to go on and on and on...
pakwife!- pakwife!

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

(but you know what they say? all jokes have some element of truth in them ;) )

[Abu Dharr Al Kashmiri]

haha, some truth in there somwhere! :eek:

Kashmiri:cool:

[Abu Jalfrezi]

Good job I have one of those, whats wrong with having a paki and a britsh wife. The best of both worlds.

[Yasir]

And then I went of for a nice honeymoon... just me, my brand new wife... and of course, me grandmother (pakwife!)I wonder if that happens in any other cultures!

[Mu'awiya]

Asalaamu alaikum warahmatulahi wabarakatuh.


lol! subhan Allaah, the thing is these pak wifes turn into the ones from here though cuz of the influence.. but the honeymoon parts so true lol.

[Abuz Zubair]

I wonder if that happens in any other cultures!
Don't know if it happens in other cultures, but it surely did happen with a bruv from East London, which is why I mentioned it.

[syedi]

No offence to anyone. It's just a parody! Just a joke!

It is the preference of an average East London bruv to 'ave an home-based Indian take away known as (pakwife!)
A trouble and strife from back home who don't speak a word of English commonly known as (pakwife!)
David Blunkett, and now John Reed have a chip on their shoulder about us importing what is known as (pakwife!)
Who's that West London bruv eating Fish and Chips? Get a life, mate! 'ave some curry and rice! (pakwife!)

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

Know what I mean, bruv?

This West London bruv's got a British wife. She makes him wash the dishes, cuz she wears the trousers! (pakwife!)
She warned him not to take a second wife. She even writ in her contract... he's under the thumb, mate! (pakwife!)
Me mum got me sorted last summer in Pak on the 10th of June of the Georgian calender... What you lafin' at?! (pakwife!)
And then I went of for a nice honeymoon... just me, my brand new wife... and of course, me grandmother (pakwife!)

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

pakwife!- pakwife!
pakwife!- pakwife!
They're never fussed about shoppin'. They like to sit at home, you know.
pakwife!- pakwife!
And they're not like you British sisters who like to go on and on and on...
pakwife!- pakwife!

All the bruvas
East London bruvas
They all go hand in hand
Hand in hand to Pak to get a wife

(but you know what they say? all jokes have some element of truth in them ;) )



Abuz Zubair, Is your mother "PAKI"?

[Abu_Abdillah2000]

Syedi, you have no sense of humour. Lighten up a bit bro.

[syedi]

i have sense of humor bro, but at the sametime i have other senses as well, alhamdulilah. :)

[Abuz Zubair]

Abuz Zubair, Is your mother "PAKI"?
No. In fact, she is originally an Indian.

A word of caution: Say what you want to say about me (more than anyone else). Just do not go near anyone's parents.

[syedi]

I was teaching and reminding you something and hope it is remembered well.

[Abuz Zubair]

The song isn't about how bad the pakis are. The song is about how absurd I feel it is for brothers to look for sisters abroad to marry.

And yes, there are many things in Paki culture I despise. Amongst them, taking your grandmother with you to your honeymoon.

If you don't like it, tough. It wasn't meant to address Paks, anyway. They will never get it.

[Ibn Adam]

I don't understand.

What's grandmas roll in the honeymoon?

[Abuz Zubair]

Ask 'Syedi' :)

[Skillganon]

Bro, I would also like to know. (because I never heard that before)

I am not waiting for Syedi tell me.

[Niqaabis]

My cousin had his father, step mother and 2 younger sisters with him on his honeymoon
they combined a family holiday and honeymoon all in one

The honeymoon tradition is not something found in the Pakistani culture, my parents never went on honeymoon, neither did my grandparents and I’m pretty sure my great grandparents didn’t either, it's something that comes from the western culture

so its probably in the 'Pakistani honeymoon' culture to bring additional family with you

A bit of East meets West I guess

[Yasir]

Don't know if it happens in other cultures, but it surely did happen with a bruv from East London, which is why I mentioned it.Where did they go?

[Abuz Zubair]

Well... I guess in a way it is a positive point in the Paki culture that they are all very close knitted ppl where all the people with the same surname tend to live together (of course, I am exaggerating). But it is, nevertheless, good how people like to live together.

The disadvantage of this is that they do not have any concept of privacy between couples, even on their honeymoon. For them, it is just another holiday, so why not take your grandmother along with you sight-seeing.

[Abuz Zubair]

No idea... the brother himself didn't tell me, but his friend.

But even if he were to tell me himself, I would be too shocked to ask: erm... where did you go?

[Abuz Zubair]

My cousin had his father, step mother and 2 younger sisters with him on his honeymoon
they combined a family holiday and honeymoon all in one

The honeymoon tradition is not something found in the Pakistani culture, my parents never went on honeymoon, neither did my grandparents and I’m pretty sure my great grandparents didn’t either, it's something that comes from the western culture

so its probably in the 'Pakistani honeymoon' culture to bring additional family with you

A bit of East meets West I guess
I wouldn't generalise. At least it doesn't happen amongst my immediate relatives in Karachi.

I was shocked when I heard it happens!

[Abuz Zubair]

Anyway, folks... this was only meant to be a harmless joke and just an attempt on my part to redo the lyrics for a popular song to see how it turns out.

Remember, this thread is in Art and Lit. section :) So take a chill pill!

[Yasir]

But even if he were to tell me himself, I would be too shocked to ask: erm... where did you go?The reason I asked is because if they'd gone to the Bahamas on honeymoon, then it certainly would be very peculiar for them to take their grandmother with them, but if they had simply gone 'back home' to their village on honeymoon, then it's not as shocking! Nevertheless your point about the close knitted family lifestyle is correct, and it's surely not without its disadvantages.

[Abuz Zubair]

Ok... this thread is becoming serious, now. It was meant to be light-hearted.

But sometimes this culture creates a lot of problems between the spouses. The wife and the mother-in-law or two opposite sides of a magnet and they aren't supposed to work together. Pakis should understand this and give their wives a separate accommodation, even if it is just a room and a toilet. A lot of sisters would sacrifice everything for a little bit of privacy, the right which most Pak in-laws do not seem to understand. Now, this is her shara'i right conflicting with cultural norms.

[Abuz Zubair]

But I guess, on the light-hearted side of things, the song created controversy. So I guess the song was good!

[Abu GG]

What's wrong with taking your grandma? It'll be a laugh. Probably enhance the relationship between the spouses during the critical period. I'd love to take my granny.. The amount of wisdom she could give us both on a beach at sunset would be phenomenal. And during tea when we get back to the hotel...

Most of you are too chuddoo to understand

[Abuz Zubair]

What's wrong with taking your grandma? It'll be a laugh. Probably enhance the relationship between the spouses during the critical period. I'd love to take my granny.. The amount of wisdom she could give us both on a beach at sunset would be phenomenal. And during tea when we get back to the hotel...

Most of you are too chuddoo to understand
HAHAHAHAHA

[Niqaabis]

I wouldn't generalise. At least it doesn't happen amongst my immediate relatives in Karachi.

I was shocked when I heard it happens!

I don’t think I was generalizing sorry if it came across like that

I was just trying to find a reason as to why it would happen
even when my cousin took his family with him I too was shocked

but then again he did marry his step mothers sister so he knew his wife pretty well where as it would have been a bit different if it were two strangers (and not forgetting his family) on the holiday/honeymoon.

[Umm Ahmed]

.. The amount of wisdom she could give us both on a beach at sunset would be phenomenal.



Now there is a picture to think about .

[juwairiyah]

Assalamo'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh

If the bro in law are pious and they too understand the concept of purdah,InshaAllah I don't think there will be much trouble though living in a separate house is always good as the couple gets privacy and easier for the bride.
But if there' r only parents and srs then it's better for the bride to live with them InshaAllah as she gets help,advices,gets to learn many things from the motehr in law.InshaAllah she 'll develop a good rapport with the mother in law and enjoy .

But in these countries the scenario is different ppl don't know the concept of purdah let alone having a separate house . I think this is far above their head due to lack of deen sadly

[Umm]

Assalamo'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh


But if there' r only parents and srs then it's better for the bride to live with them InshaAllah as she gets help,advices,gets to learn many things from the motehr in law.InshaAllah she 'll develop a good rapport with the mother in law and enjoy .


:eek:

Sadly sis, that doesn't often happen. Even with practicing sister-in-laws, let alone jaahil ones. So many times I have heard my friends' sister in laws who are practicing let out a snippy comment about the wife. Woman's nature is jealous.
I think it's awesome when a daughter in law gets on with her mother in law, but I can't say I have witnessed it much. Far and wide is my advice.

[justabro]

:eek:

Sadly sis, that doesn't often happen. Even with practicing sister-in-laws, let alone jaahil ones. So many times I have heard my friends' sister in laws who are practicing let out a snippy comment about the wife. Woman's nature is jealous.
I think it's awesome when a daughter in law gets on with her mother in law, but I can't say I have witnessed it much. Far and wide is my advice.

My mother and my wife get along fairly well (two years of living together, although that wasnt my choice but my parents wanted it that way) but even then, both of them had to walk on eggshells to keep it that way. Don't get me wrong, they have about as good a mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship as one can get, but in every other case i've ever heard of (no matter how religious both parties are), the end result is usually that the mother in law and daughter in law despise one another.

[juwairiyah]

Assalamo'alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

Alhamdulillah I know a sis who gets along well with her mother in law mashaAllah .I think it has to work from both sides.

.

[Umm Ahmed]

I also get along with my mother inlaw , due to similar circumstances that "justabro" mentioned , if your working alongside the family doing housework then you get to know each other pretty well , we had differences of opinion with a lot of things due to cultures, but she was never rude and I said InshaAllaah to everything : )

[Abuz Zubair]

UA, since you live in UAE I would assume your house as probably three times the size of what we live in, in the UK as you'd know.

Things might not be the same if you were living with your mother-in-law in London. In small houses it is easier to step on each other's toes.

[Umm Ahmed]

Thats true of the house my inlaws live in today , but we lived alltogether in a small place till the new house was built. But I know it must be hard at home with one bathroom and a tiny kitchen. Maintaining one's hijaab at all times if brother inlaws were there, that would be a struggle as well.

[Ibn Abul Ma'ali]

but then again he did marry his step mothers sister so he knew his wife pretty well where as it would have been a bit different if it were two strangers (and not forgetting his family) on the holiday/honeymoon.

:confused: Sorry, but is that even permissible? I mean, if he has half brother's/sisters from his step mother, then how would they view his offspring? As nieces/nephews or cousins? I'm confused just thinking about it.

Step mother's cousin I could imagine, but her sister? The son is marrying his father's sister inlaw? So the sister then becomes the step mother inlaw!!!??? :eek:

Sorry, I got to stop there! :confused: :confused:

My brain might explode!

Take care & stay safe

Wassalamu Alaikum

Ibn Abul Ma'ali

[Niqaabis]

It's a bit mixed up because they are also first cousins

it happened like this

 uncle married to aunty

 aunty passes away leaving 3 small children (2 girls 1 boy)

 uncle cannot manage and marries his sister in laws oldest daughter (his children’s cousin)

 they have 2 kids (2 girls)

 son grows up and marries his step mother’s sisters (who is also his first cousin)

 they have no kids at the moment

I hope I haven’t confused you more

He has always seen his wife as his first cousin so he did it with the intention he’s marrying his first cousin (who just happens to be his step mothers sister) I hope this is permissible

As for their children, I really don’t know what the rulings would be especially if they have a boy, would his step mothers daughters need to observe hijaab in front of him?

:confused:

[Ibn Abul Ma'ali]

It's a bit mixed up because they are also first cousins

You said it sister!

As for their children, I really don’t know what the rulings would be especially if they have a boy, would his step mothers daughters need to observe hijaab in front of him?
:confused:


Wow...let's do some hypothetical fiqh here.

Well, the step mother has 2 daughters, and they are the paternal sisters of the boy (your cousin), as the father is the same but the mothers are different. In this case, the brother could also act as a Wali for them, in the event of the father not being present or having passed away.
He (the boy - now a man) marries his step mother's sister, who is also his cousin. If they have children, especially a boy, then his paternal sisters will not have to observe Hijaab infront of him when he grows up, as he will be the son of their paternal brother, i.e. their nephew - if their brother is mahram to them, then so should his son be mahram - this relationship overrides the fact that the son would also be considered as their maternal cousin - as their mother's are sisters - but the paternal link is stronger!

Wow! Not confused sister -Masha'Allah, that was interesting!

If I have made any mistakes, then please someone (Abu Zubair :p ) correct me if I am wrong!

Take care & stay safe

Wassalamu Alaikum

Ibn Abul Ma'ali

[Niqaabis]

wa 'alaikum as salaam

Jazaak Allaahu khairan

Its clear now

[WM]

Wow.

I wouldn't like to be the person who has to figure out the inheritance for that family...

[UmmAbdulMalikStorm]

Poor mother in laws! I dont get why everyone cant get on with them. Its the sister in laws u have to watch out for (husbands brothers wives) urgh! Now THEY have issues!

I feel sorry for paki wives, they cant do or say jack.

[Umm]

My husband told me a joke yesterday regarding marrying a "pakwife"
Man and his pakwife go for a divorce. Wife emerges from shari'ah court in tears. The husband says "What's wrong? We'll still be cousins."

[MosDef]

Hilarious. That one will do the rounds

[Abuz Zubair]

My husband told me a joke yesterday regarding marrying a "pakwife"
Man and his pakwife go for a divorce. Wife emerges from shari'ah court in tears. The husband says "What's wrong? We'll still be cousins."
LOL... this is hilarious

[Yasir]

Man and his pakwife go for a divorce. Wife emerges from shari'ah court in tears.In Arabic, an opponent or rival in a legal case is known as 'khasm' (خَصْم). In Punjabi and some Urdu dialects, a husband is referred to with the same term.

[Magoo]

In Arabic, an opponent or rival in a legal case is known as 'khasm' (خَصْم). In Punjabi and some Urdu dialects, a husband is referred to with the same term.

subhanAllah i didnt know that, that is a very common phrase especially with the mirpuris

[umm emman]

yup it is.. i dont like that term...

[Abuz Zubair]

What's up with the Mirpuris? I've heard that they aren't liked very much by Paks themselves, is it true?

[MosDef]

Yes because the Mirpuris are thought of as a lower cast - somehow not on the same level as the posh kapoor/cooper wannabes living in defence. Although the tables have turned in england - alhamdulillah. Pakistan could easily be 5 different countries. Urdu speakers hate the mirpuris and vice versa. Same nonsense happens in India although to a more extreme level.

Im sure there are exceptions.

[Magoo]

the mirpuris are generally considerd to be uncouth and uneducated by our non mirpuri pakistani brethren, also 70% of the u.k pakis are from mirpur (source - bbc) so they have made a lot of money in the u.k (not necesserily halal money!!) and invested back home and they seem to be prospering aswell

we dont speak urdu very well, rather we speak a harsh punjabi dialect called pahari whcih is also frowned upon.

i think its starting change slowly but i have to admit myself that the people in mirpur are uncouth but then again i dont have much experience with the rest of the pakis so Allah knows best

[Abu Dharr Al Kashmiri]

Mirpuris are not a caste - Mirpur is a town just inside Pakistan Administered Kashmir. We live further up in Kashmir and when people ask us too, "Are you Mirpuri?!":eek:

[MosDef]

So do you feel offended when people ask you if you are mirpuri?

[Milk Shaykh]

Here we go with the age old Mirpur Kotli debate!

[Abu Dharr Al Kashmiri]

So do you feel offended when people ask you if you are mirpuri?

No i never have been offended, the muslims are all brothers regardless of nationality. The only people i think that would have a problem with others are those secular, tribal, nationalistic kind. Some of the best brothers i have ever met come from Mirpur - Diamond geezas!

[MosDef]

Alhamdulillah,

The only reason i ask is many people complain that no one wants to marry them if they are mirpuri.

Poor sods :)

[umm emman]

Alhamdulillah,

The only reason i ask is many people complain that no one wants to marry them if they are mirpuri.

Poor sods :)

i didnt know dat really? so if ur mirpuri no1 will marry u? i know the oldies r proper in2 their culture.. it aint a bad place.. but some people look scary.. i suppose u get good and bad everywhere.. but nah wouldnt like to live there...

[Magoo]

No i never have been offended, the muslims are all brothers regardless of nationality. The only people i think that would have a problem with others are those secular, tribal, nationalistic kind. Some of the best brothers i have ever met come from Mirpur - Diamond geezas!

Jazakallah khayr :D

Alhamdulillah,

The only reason i ask is many people complain that no one wants to marry them if they are mirpuri.

Poor sods :)

:eek: i have heard these malicious rumours about people not wanting to marry mirpuris, trust me, they dont know what they are missing out on :cool:

[UmmAbdulMalikStorm]

I was going to say i dont like mirpuris either but when u actually say it, it just sounds awful. Its like being a racist and a prude. They are uncouth and i hate the way they speak but they're still muslim. From today, i wont say i dont like mirpuris. But i will still take the mick.

Thank you.

[UmmAbdulMalikStorm]

Magoo i dont think they're missing out on much

[sabr]

This was a good laugh..

[Scented Blood]

Here we go with the age old Mirpur Kotli debate!


If all else fails...:D

Mirpur got more beggers to a square metre then any other place i seen.

Kotli are haters coz its richer in Mirpur.

Does the 'president' of Kashmir Shurddar Skundur still live in kotli?

[Magoo]

If all else fails...:D

Mirpur got more beggers to a square metre then any other place i seen.

Kotli are haters coz its richer in Mirpur.

Does the 'president' of Kashmir Shurddar Skundur still live in kotli?

i heard hes in luton at the moment

[leo]

Poor mother in laws! I dont get why everyone cant get on with them.

I feel sorry for paki wives, they cant do or say jack.

The "fault" lies with men as usual.

[I_Am_A_Hermit]

The "fault" lies with men as usual.

Not really.

Women are to blame [majority of the time]