Question Pride, arrogance and stubbornness

Discussion in 'Identity, Activism and Unity' started by Abu Qudhama, Dec 30, 2011.

  1. Abu Qudhama

    Abu Qudhama Active Member

    As-salamu 'Alaykum warahmatulahi wabarakaatahu,

    Can someone give me advice regarding these 3 issues

    1. Pride
    2. Arrogance
    3. Stubbornness

    since im having many problems with them, wallahi it will be much appreciated, may Allah purify us from these diseases.
  2. Muslim1

    Muslim1 Active Member

    walikum wasalam wr wb

    To be honest, the only thing I can come up with for pride and arrogance, is remembering all those you hurt and remember all those that hate you and all the mistakes you made, basically all the types you've tripped and maybe look at the good in others, such as, people who have less then you but are still happy and grateful and in that case, could be better then you.

    Compare yourselves to the real good sheikhs and the sahaba and the people who pray all night, fast every two days, cry everyday at the memory of their sins whilst having nothing compared to most. Poor, tossed around yet grateful.
    and you'll probably come to realise you're worth nothing compared to them.

    And I don't see how someone could be arrogant when they know they're nothing compared to others.
  3. Muslim1

    Muslim1 Active Member

    wait-slash that, I should give myself that advice first.
  4. Abu Qudhama

    Abu Qudhama Active Member

    BarakAllahu feekum akhi :) may Allah bless you
  5. Abul Qa'qa

    Abul Qa'qa طوبى للشام

    Wa'alaykumus-salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuhu akhi kareem.


    Wallahi this is for my self first and then to you.

    The three subjects are related to each other so I think any advice on each point overlaps onto the other point also.

    Firstly, afew Ahadeeth regarding this issue, which should make us all greatly concerned regarding the matter:

    Indeed Pride only belongs to Allah, He is al-Mutakabbir. For what can the slave be arrogant about? We think of ourselves as something, but in reality we are no more than pebbles. These are the plots of Shaytaan.

    If we were to think we have knowledge, then look to those more knowledgable than us. The majority of us have not even memorised the Book of Allah, or even half of it - let alone all the other sciences of Religion. We should look at those who are knowledgable, alive and dead, and see how our knowledge is no more than a drop of water compared to the ocean they possess.

    If we were to become arrogant due to practicing the Deen of Allah, then this is a Blessing of Allah and not our own selves who made this possible. It was Allah who guided us, so we need to look to what we were before he guided us to realise our true conditions.

    If we were to look at those older than us, we should acknowledge that they have preceded us in Deen, knowledge, & wisdom - if one may be lacking, the others will still apply. We need to realise that they have been practicing for longer than us, or at the very least have been Muslim for longer than us, so they have beaten us in deeds.

    If we look to those younger than us, we should acknowledge we have preceded them in sins. We have been upon Allah's earth for longer than them, and we have been disobedient for a longer period than they have.

    If we were to look at those who are Jaahil, then we need to understand who gave us this knowledge. We were once also Jaahil, so we should not be proud, but greatful to al-Aleem, al-Hakeem for what he has given us over others.

    If we were to look at the Fusaaq, then we should consider how they are sinning whilst ignorant of Allah and His Blessings, whilst we sin after He has guided us. Woe to us, for this is even more severe than the prior.

    If we were to say we have wealth, then we need to know that the majority of Jannah are the poor. How many Prophets and Messengers, alayhimus-salaam, came that were rejected by the rich, but were sheltered by the poor - it was none other than arrogance which deterred the prior. Also, look at how Allah 'azza wajal say that it is those who have wealth who ask leave from Muhammad, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, from the duty of Jihaad Fee Sabeelillah, whilst the poor rushed to the cause - and those who were so poor that they couldnt contribute anything and were turned away, they left with tears running down their faces. Rizq comes only from ar-Razaaq.

    If we look at our health or beauty, then Who is the One Who fashioned us and created us? It was He, al-Khaaliq, Subhaanahu, Who blessed us with perfect health whilst others were not given the same blessing - shall we not be thankful! Even if we were to be disabled or paralyzed, even still there are so many blessings still present, and so many we have been preferred over. A man came to one of the Salaf and asked him for money and said he was poor. The 'Aalim told him, "I will purchase your arm from you for so and so amount of Dinaars." The man obviously rejected the offer and couldnt believe the response. So the 'Aalim told him, you have been given that which you will not even sell for millions, so how can you say you are poor.

    If we say we do alot of 'Ibaadah, then do we know if this will be accepted from us? Indeed if it is done with Riyaa, Kibr, or other evils of the heart, then these insincere actions will not even be accepted - so what of all the 'Ibaadah for which we boast about! Also, it was narrated by 'Aaishah, radiyAllahu anha, that RasoolAllah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, would pray all night until the soles of his feet would crack and swell, she said to him why do you do such when all your past and future sins are forgiven, to which the best of creation, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, replied "Should I not be a thankful slave" - now what about us?

    We should be in between these two positions; when we think good of ourselves, then see how puny our actions are compared to those above us in that aspect. If we were to think bad of other, then look at the evils of our own deeds which would make us forgetful of others' deeds. The statement from 'Eesa, alayhi salaam, as well as by one of the Salaf, about seeing the small thorn in the eye of our brother when ignoring the great plank of wood in our own eyes is how we should always be.

    It is from the ways of the pious to magnify your sins, and ignore your good deeds - for we do not know of our condition and are never safe from the evils of ourselves. If we were to constatntly remember our evil deeds, we would not even be able to look anybody in the eye. How can a person who uses his eyes in this Dunyah for evil, think that he will have the greatest of blessing ever, which is to see Allah, 'azza wajal, with his own eyes in Jannah? Our condition is pitiful, because we are not worthy of such a status. It is time after time that Allah, Subhaanahu, Blesses us yet we return to disobeying Him. And in the end, all of our deeds will not be sufficient to take us to Jannah, it is the Mercy of ar-Rahmaan.

    So akhi, even though we all slip up and fall for Shaytaan's traps, we need to understand there is not a single thing for which we can have arrogance. Instead we should hold our heads in shame, and let our eyes weep blood over what we have done, and what we continually do. When we read the stories of the Sahaaba and the Salaf, we see great examples of fear of Allah and extensive weeping and so on - all this by those who have been confirmed to be the best generations of mankind. Then what is our situation today?

    I remember a short story from 'Umar, radiyAllahu anhu. He was on the Mimbar and he started to talk about his childhood and how hard his life was, and how roughly he was treated - he said this in a way to undermine himself. When he stepped down, 'Abdur-Rahmaan bin Awf, radiyAllahu anhu, asked him why he said those things for he has done nothing other than humiliate himself before the people - thise whilst being the Khalifah. To which 'Umar replied that his Nafs was becoming proud of his position, so he had to put it in place. Allahu Akbar, what examples we have in our Salaf - if only we could talk heed.

    I end with the words of Allah, Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala:

    Sahih International
    Assuredly, Allah knows what they conceal and what they declare. Indeed, He does not like the arrogant. (Soorah an-Nahl, Ayaah 23)

    Wallahu A'lam.
    Last edited: Dec 30, 2011
  6. Abu Qudhama

    Abu Qudhama Active Member

    May Allah reward both of you brothers Jannah tul firdaus, wallahi both of you gave amazing advice, i ask Allah to remove me from the ranks of the munafiqeen, and im not saying this in order to show off but insha'Allah so you can make dua for me
  7. Abul Qa'qa

    Abul Qa'qa طوبى للشام


    May we all be cleansed of Nifaaq, Kibr, and all the other evils within us. Ameen ya Rabb.
  8. JustAnotherAnas

    JustAnotherAnas Well-Known Member

    May Allah reward you for reminding all of us in what we all need.

    May Allah reward the posters before me whose advice was beautiful.

    In a couple of words inshallah this is generally what I would say to myself in relation to each situation.

    Pride: (O Sunnih), how can you have pride when you know how long your list of sins is. You know yourself better that what you appear to people who might praise you. To deny such you would be a fool. But then only a fool can be proud.

    Arrogance: (O Sunnih), your arrogance only shows your lack of sincerity. If you were sincere you would humble yourself. You can not humble yourself unless you are a learned one. Arrogance and ignorance go hand in hand.

    Stubbornness: (O Sunnih), where is your stubbornness in defying sin? If sins defeat you, then you are weak. A weak one can not be stubborn.
    Last edited: Dec 31, 2011
  9. Abu Qudhama

    Abu Qudhama Active Member

    Akhi may Allah have mercy upon you, that is beautiful advice :)
  10. JustAnotherAnas

    JustAnotherAnas Well-Known Member

    Ameen bro. May Allah have mercy on you too and on all of us.
  11. abuhannah

    abuhannah Well-Known Member

    ukhti,Muslim1 is a sister..

    Wa salamolaikom wr wb..
  12. Abul Qa'qa

    Abul Qa'qa طوبى للشام

    Maashaa-Allah beautiful advice akhi, very eloquent and concise. May Allah grant you al-Firdaws akhi. Ameen.
  13. JustAnotherAnas

    JustAnotherAnas Well-Known Member

    Ameen. May Allah grant al-firdaws to you too my bro.

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