Important Private messaging between genders

Discussion in 'Events and Announcements' started by Niqaabis, Jul 26, 2011.

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  1. Niqaabis

    Niqaabis Sadiyah Bint as-Seenee

    As salaam ‘alaikum warahmatullaah,

    May this message reach all of you in the best of health and eemaan.

    It has been brought to our attention that some members have been sending private messages of praises to the opposite gender. I would like to reiterate that our forum rules state,

    If you wish to thank a member of the opposite gender then I suggest you make du'aa for them, as we are all in great need of this.

    Any member found to be violating any of the rules above will be sent a warning.

    I hope no one is offended by this reminder but we just want this forum to be a place of barakah, therefore we try to eradicate any haraam to the best of our ability.

    Baarak Allaahu feekum.
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
    Kashur likes this.
  2. Muneer88

    Muneer88 هنيئاً لك الشهادة

    unmarried letting shaytan get the best of them...or at least that's what I suspect here...or why would someone PM a sis / bro when you can say barakAllahu fik /fiki here on the open forum or click on the Thanks button..but they prefer to PM the opposite gender....hmmm...
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
  3. Aboo Shayba


    LOL @ friend request considered free mixing. Serious? Not that I am advocating it - and plus I support that it shouldn't be allowed. However under the pretext that it is viewed as free-mixing - the Shar'i term or just generally, because man and women replying in the same thread could be viewed as free-mixing if are saying 'generally'.

    P.s. The 'LOL' is not for the sis - it is at the idea of 'friend request' on the profile is viewed as free-mixing.
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
  4. Abu Idris Al-Albani

    Abu Idris Al-Albani New Member

    We free-mix on the forum everyday. A male responding to a thread/post by a sister and vice versa is technically free-mixing. I don't see any Mahrams registered around here.

    Imagine sisters needed a Mahram to post. LOL "XXXX's Father"..."XXXX's Brother" ahhaha
  5. umm hafsa

    umm hafsa Anti-Free mixing

    Some forums may lead to fitnah between the sexes
    In some Islamic forums there is a section for amusement. It normally contains funny and rare issues. Its aim is to amuse the members. It is run by good brothers and sisters, we think they are good and Allah knows best.
    We noticed in some forums, especially in this section, that men and women started to mix together and use expressions like “ha ha ha” and “may Allah please you”. In addition to some funny pictures that does not oppose Islam like children in funny situations or pictures of the nature that contain some funny aspect, and using the expressional faces (emotions) in titles and replies. Also the kind of subjects they discuss together, we think that it can open a door of fitnah.
    We suggest some limits to be ruled on forums, especially this amusing section. We suggest that it should be only for brothers, not sisters, although the sisters will be able to read all was typed on this section, but will not be able to share or reply. Knowing that there is no ways we can know if the participant is a brother or a sister, as we do not have but the name.
    Is there any way by which we can control this section in forums? Whether by allowing only specific subjects, or specific replies on these subjects, or by making it for only one sex? Knowing that everyone will be able to read what is written in this section even the unregistered guests.
    Is there any specific subjects you suggest that are Islamic and at the same time achieving the aim of this section which is amusing these good brothers and sisters. Or it is better if we just block this section if it is a door of fitnah? What do you advise us to do?.

    Praise be to Allaah.

    Most of what happens in so called amusement forums is carelessness and a lack of control over posts and comments, because both men and women participate in these forums. This is undoubtedly a door to fitnah, so people may be impressed or attracted, then try to get in touch via e-mail and the like. Hence we think that this door should be closed, and the amusement forum should be restricted to men, and another forum should be set up for women only for the same purpose, if there is a need for that.

    If a man tricks the participants in the forum and enters as if he is a woman (or vice versa), then the sin of that lie is borne by him alone. There is no sin on you, in sha Allaah, so long as you have announced clearly that it is not allowed for women to take part in the men’s forums or for men to take part in the women’s forums.

    And Allaah knows best.

    Islam Q&A

    Islam Question and Answer - He got to know her through a forum and he wants to propose marriage to her
  6. Niqaabis

    Niqaabis Sadiyah Bint as-Seenee

    Its true, but its up to us as individuals to take account for ourselves, there is only so much us moderators can do.

    With the month of ramadhaan approaching I'm sure we are all re-evaluting ourselves so that we can come out of this month as ones who attain piety, inshaa Allaah.
  7. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    This is all fine sister, but may I ask you - why do you have your MSN icon under your Rep Power then, as someone may contact you, and by having that little icon there, it's like you keep the door to conversation open? No offense meant, I'm just curious ... Anybody on this forum can get your MSN and misuse it. I give MSN and similar only to my friends, and I don't have female friends for that matter.
  8. Niqaabis

    Niqaabis Sadiyah Bint as-Seenee

    The msn contact is an account I had linked with my website which has now been shut down maybe 5 years ago. Myself and someone else would use the account but its is no longer in use I just have not got round to removing it from my profile.

    Jazaak Allaah khair for the reminder I will remove it now.
  9. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    Wa iyyaki.
  10. Umm Waraqa Bluebell

    Umm Waraqa Bluebell kalimat al-ikhlaas

    Are you lot reading people's Private messages????

    But anyway, now that we're on the topic...If i do this - "haha"- via an anonymous rep to the opposite gender, is that violating the rules?

    (If anyone HAS been given a "haha" recently,please don't assume it was me, i tend to leave my name so i'm just saying)
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
  11. Niqaabis

    Niqaabis Sadiyah Bint as-Seenee

    No I can assure we have no access or intention of reading anyones private messages

    A complaint was made to us about a private message so we had to deal with it.
  12. Abu Treika

    Abu Treika Magoo

    The moderating team do not have access to private messages for users on this forum in any way whatsoever. Obviously the site admin is capable of seeing the messages if they were to sift through the raw data but this is not done at all and this is a trust between you and the admin.
  13. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    Whoever smashed me for this post above - do it again please. It'll make me feel more at piece. And son, have some Sabr next time.
  14. I am actually surprised that the moderators don't monitor messages between genders. I know a Islamic forum that does that, not sure if that is a good thing or not.

    Regarding, laughing at opposite gender in anonymous reps, We should fear Allah as much as we can, and avoid this completely. Alhamdulillah for the strict rules on the forum. I have seen sisters and brothers laughing and joking, with smiles and tongues sticking out in other Islamic forums. Even though I believe that the forum is mixed, a sister replies to a brother, and vice versa, alhamdulillah we keep it to a minimum level in interacting, and only for answering questions, necessary comments and requests.

    If you rep anonymously to a moderator, he/she can see who gave them a rep.
  15. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    The problem is if it was a moderator who neg repped ... so then there are only 2 options (left to mods):
    1) Be just and nevermind other mods
    2) Mind other mods and nevermind being just

    Edit: I was talking about neg reps not rep only, so apologies for that.
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
  16. Abu Hurairah

    Abu Hurairah Well-Known Member

    Stop writing stupid/annoying things and no-one will neg rep you.
  17. I read that about 3 times now, I don't know what you're trying to say.
  18. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    I'm 99% sure it was you. In your mind something can be annoying whilst not in somebody else's mind. You're fast to pull a trigger bro. Learn how to evaluate posts with a more just view and a spark of wisdom. Now if this is annoying, then why not smashing a neg rep again?

    Use of force is a well known weapon of those who have no arguments. And this is not your 1st time.

    Edit: Apologies to Abu Hurairah. Yes, his initials do not read as ATH.
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2011
  19. Abu Treika

    Abu Treika Magoo

    I neg repped you and I did it as a forum poster and not as a moderator.

    Any way - haven't you left this forum never to return about 4 times this month already?
  20. الحصان الأسود

    الحصان الأسود Oudh Burnerrrr

    It was related to unjustly giving somebody a neg rep. Unjustly in my view, very much justly in mod's view.
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